Margaret Donovan and The Advantages of Not Walking on Water

I probably don't know the names of the people who made the biggest difference in your life. You probably don't know the names of the people who made the biggest difference in mine.

I do know the name of the president of the United States. I know the name of some movie stars. I know the names of some sports stars. They stand out, and they do great things.
But lots of people do great things, and they don't all stand out. Most of them don't, because they're too busy helping people to worry about standing out.

I know the names of Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer, the lead actors in the movie The Sound of Music. And I remember one of my favorite scenes in the movie, where Andrews's Maria and Plummer's Captain look into each others eyes in the gazebo, in the moonlight. They look incredibly beautiful.

I don't know the name of the camera operator, the lighting technician, the set designer, the hair and makeup people, or the cinematographer, all of whom helped make that scene as beautiful as it is, and they probably had as much or more to do with making the scene work than the actors.

At random, I looked up the name of the hair stylist. She's the late Margaret Donovan. Her imdb page shows 67 credits, many of those for TV series where she was the supervising hair stylist for dozens of episodes. She was the hair stylist supervisor for the Adam West Batman series, which immediately puts her in the top tier of coolest human beings ever in my book. And she spent her whole career making other people look beautiful.

Arguably, Margaret Donovan gave me more total joy than Christopher Plummer (who's also pretty awesome).

And until five minutes ago, I didn't know her name.

Things or people aren't nearly as important as relationships. It's not Julie Andrews (or even Margaret Donovan) who is particularly important. What's particularly important are the personal and professional relationships they are and were part of.

Matthew 14:22-33 starts with Jesus sending the disciples away. God had just fed thousands of people with very little food, and Jesus orders his friends, his disciples, to get into a boat and leave him.

Maybe Jesus was feeling a bit overwhelmed, and needed a moment to himself (and God), but maybe there's something else going on here. Maybe Jesus was setting them up so that they'd learn something.

It appears that the disciples didn't really want to leave Jesus alone. To make things worse, they can't even stay close to Jesus. The winds and waves blow them away.
I'd always thought that the wind and waves described a storm and that the disciples were afraid, but the text doesn't say that. It says that the boat was far from land because the wind was against them. They would have followed the shore, ready for Jesus to join them, but they couldn't.

They weren't afraid. Not yet. They were frustrated. They were annoyed. They spend a long night struggling to be close to their Lord. They spend hours in a pointless effort to be faithful.

Then they see something coming toward them on the water.

Now, they were afraid. They didn't know what was going on, and the most probable thing in this impossible situation is that this thing headed for them was some kind of phantasm, some terrifying visitor from the underworld.

But it wasn't. Jesus's voice calms them.

And then Peter screws up.

I know. Most Sunday school classes say that Peter is the hero here, at least until he looks away from Jesus. Peter walked out of the boat, trusting in Jesus. He left his comfort zone, dared the wind and waves to walk to his master. It only goes bad when he looks away.

Only nobody was afraid of the wind and the waves. They were afraid of the ghost, and the ghost wasn't real.

I think Peter screwed up the moment he opened his mouth. It wasn't enough for Peter just to look at the wonderful thing Jesus was doing; Peter had to do it too. And Peter wanted to be the one to do it.

Peter doesn't say, "Command US to come to you on the water."

He says, "Command ME to come to  you on the water."

Peter cuts the ties with the others in the boat, wanting special power and a special relationship with Jesus. It is only God's grace that keeps him on the water. He walks despite his faith, not because of it.

But when you start separating yourself from people, it's hard to stop.

Peter finds that once he's tried to stand above the other disciples, he can't even keep his relationship with Jesus in one piece. He begins to sink.

And he misses the point the others didn't. While he was busy defying physics, Jesus was making his way to the boat.

The boat where those people Peter left behind were waiting on Jesus, and trusting in Jesus.

They weren't getting in the water, but not because they were weak in faith. Remember, all of these people left their homes and loved ones and everything they knew to follow Jesus. They are heroes, not stooges. (Well, Judas was there too, but still...)

I know, the Sunday school lessons say that this is a story about keeping your eyes on Jesus and doing the miraculous.

But you don't have to do miracles.

Really, you don't.

And, even when it feels like everything in the world, every blasted thing, is pushing you away from where you know you want to be, even when it feels like you can't do anything, because the winds and the waves are against you, don't worry.

And even if you take your eyes off Jesus, don't beat yourself up. Don't be afraid, don't feel ashamed, and don't worry.

Christ will find you. You aren't disappointing Jesus. You aren't screwing everything up. Just stay in the boat, look for Jesus, and look after each other.

And if you do like Peter and start breaking relationships because... well, the reason doesn't matter. Christ won't let you go then either.

Look how Jesus treated Peter: When Peter started trying to stand out rather than serve, Jesus let him walk out.

Jesus knew what was going to happen.

Jesus did what Peter asked, commanded Peter to come to him, knowing full well what Peter was doing to the others, knowing what he was doing to himself, knowing full well how this was going to go very bad. Jesus let Peter screw up, maybe to show Peter that it really wasn't about him.

And then, Jesus put Peter where he belonged: back in the boat.

And then, the winds and waves stopped.